A Load of Bullshit – Literal Cow Feces

Max Temkin@MaxTemkinFollow

If you buy the poop expecting it to be something else that’s not poop, you’re actually buying a valuable life lesson for $6.

12:06 PM – 28 Nov 14 Reply Retweet Favorite

Hey, do you like cow shit? Do you want to be wholly trolled? When Cards Against Humanity Did it in 2014, they raised the bar to an art form. They are utterly not screwing around. haha, get it utter-ly.

Let me paint a picture for you. I consider myself an avid CAH enthusiast as I have most of the sets and unique packs. CAH appeals to my very low brow and very dark sense of humor. This led me to the CAH website 10 mins after opening on Black Friday. At the time I was utterly unaware of CAH black Friday track record. I swooped on this deal like an eagle going after a lizard. Six bucks! I’ll give them six bucks for a card called, “Bullshit.” Here is the FAQ that I ignored:

Are you selling any of your normal products today? No.

Is this actually poop? Yes.

Is it also something that’s not poop? No.

Can I return it when I realize that it’s actually just poop? No.

Is the poop dangerous? No. The poop is sterilized.

Is it legal to mail poop? Only one way to be sure.

Why is the poop only $6? Through the magic of incredible Black Friday super-savings.

download
Imgur
txueUlK
All the best shit is made in America. Imgur

I bought cow shit for six dollars. I found out later that day in conversation with my husband when he was marveling at CAH’s trolling. His response to me buying it was, “wut?” I bought Freeze dried, beautifully boxed cow shit and a life lesson. Read the FAQ or fine print. Even so, I still think I would have bought it which probably says a lot about me. Getting sent bull feces from CAH for Black Friday has been a running joke in my family for the last four years. Every time I order something stupid off of Amazon in an Ambien fueled spending spree my husband says, “at least you didn’t order cow shit.” I did however buy 10 pounds of gummy bears twice because apparently, I have no idea how much that is in gummy bears, twice.

rrz7KZ9
Imgur

Here is an absolutely fantastic email exchange from a customer sad about getting poop.

1

2.png

Here we are 4 years later, and the beautifully designed box of freeze-dried cow poop is on display in our curio cabinet. It has pride-of-place next to all sorts of family heirlooms and trophies. Why? Because it is hilarious.. and still brings my family great joy.

 

 

 

 

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s